What is a MIAM? Everything you need to know before your first family mediation meeting
- hagansteven
- Jul 29
- 4 min read
Learn what happens at a MIAM, how to prepare, what to expect, confidentiality, domestic abuse screening and whether mediation is right for you.
If you've been told you need to attend a MIAM, you're probably wondering what it actually involves.
Many people arrive feeling anxious because they imagine they'll be sitting opposite their former partner or making important decisions straight away.
Fortunately, neither of those things happens.
A Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting (MIAM) is simply the first step in exploring whether family mediation is suitable for your situation. It gives you the opportunity to understand your options, ask questions and decide how you would like to move forward.
At New Moon Mediation, we aim to make every MIAM calm, informative and supportive, helping you understand your choices without any pressure.
What does MIAM stand for?
MIAM stands for Mediation Information and Assessment Meeting.
It's an individual meeting between you and an authorised family mediator.
The meeting gives you the opportunity to:
explain your situation
understand how family mediation works
discuss alternatives to court
consider whether mediation is appropriate
ask any questions you may have
For many private family court applications involving children or finances, attending a MIAM is usually expected unless a recognised exemption applies.
Is a MIAM mediation?
No.
This is probably the biggest misunderstanding.
A MIAM is not mediation.
Your former partner is not present.
No negotiations take place.
No decisions have to be made.
Instead, it is a confidential conversation between you and the mediator, allowing us to understand your circumstances and assess whether mediation is likely to be safe and productive.
What happens during a MIAM?
Although every family is different, a typical MIAM lasts around an hour.
During the meeting we'll discuss:
your family circumstances
the issues you'd like to resolve
your children (where relevant)
finances or property (where relevant)
how mediation works
other forms of dispute resolution
whether mediation appears suitable
any safeguarding concerns
what happens next
You'll have plenty of opportunity to ask questions throughout.
Why is a MIAM important?
A MIAM isn't simply a box-ticking exercise.
It gives people an opportunity to consider whether issues can be resolved without the emotional and financial cost of court.
Even if mediation isn't appropriate, you'll leave understanding your options much better than when you arrived.
Sometimes mediation is suitable.
Sometimes another form of dispute resolution is more appropriate.
The purpose of the MIAM is to help identify the most appropriate route for your individual circumstances.
Domestic abuse and safeguarding screening
One of the most important parts of every MIAM is screening for domestic abuse, safeguarding concerns and any factors that could affect the safety or fairness of mediation.
This isn't designed to judge anyone.
It helps ensure that mediation only proceeds where it can take place safely and fairly.
We will explore issues such as:
domestic abuse
coercive or controlling behaviour
intimidation
safeguarding concerns
mental wellbeing
substance misuse (where relevant)
whether both people are able to negotiate freely
Sometimes mediation remains appropriate, perhaps using separate arrival times, shuttle mediation or online sessions.
In other situations, mediation may not be suitable at all.
Your safety always comes first. The Family Mediation Council's professional standards require mediators to assess suitability carefully before mediation proceeds.
Is a MIAM confidential?
Yes.
MIAMs are confidential.
What you discuss with your mediator is not shared with the other person simply because they ask.
The purpose of confidentiality is to allow you to speak openly about your situation.
There are, however, limited exceptions where confidentiality may need to be broken, such as where there are serious safeguarding concerns, a risk of significant harm, or where disclosure is required by law.
Your mediator will explain confidentiality fully at the beginning of your meeting.
How should I prepare?
There's no need to prepare detailed paperwork.
Instead, it helps to think about:
what you'd like to achieve
the issues that concern you most
what arrangements currently exist
what questions you'd like answered
whether there are any safety concerns
what outcome you hope for
If finances are likely to be discussed later, it can also be useful to begin gathering information about income, savings, pensions and property, although this isn't usually required for the MIAM itself.
What happens after the MIAM?
After meeting with you, the mediator will decide whether mediation appears suitable.
If both people attend separate MIAMs and mediation is appropriate, joint or shuttle mediation sessions can be arranged.
If mediation isn't suitable, you'll be advised about other possible routes to resolving matters, which may include:
solicitor negotiations
collaborative law
arbitration
early neutral evaluation
court proceedings where appropriate
Where a court application requires confirmation that a MIAM has taken place, an authorised family mediator can complete the relevant court documentation where the legal requirements have been met.
Do I have to continue with mediation?
No.
Attending a MIAM does not commit you to mediation.
The meeting is about understanding your options and deciding whether mediation is right for your circumstances.
There is no obligation to proceed simply because you've attended.
Book a MIAM with New Moon Mediation
If you're separating and need advice about child arrangements, finances or other family matters, a MIAM is often the best place to begin.
At New Moon Mediation, we provide MIAMs online across England and Wales, offering a calm, professional and supportive environment where you can understand your options and decide on the next steps with confidence.
Whether mediation goes ahead or another route is more appropriate, you'll leave with a clearer understanding of the choices available to you.
Ready to book your MIAM? Contact New Moon Mediation today to arrange your appointment.
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